a cry for kelp
Fought the laptop for a while last night, and played the organ through it for about a half hour without anything crashing. Encouraged! Then I dreamt of taking it into the computer store for an upgrade, and discovering that it contained a big hairy repulsive spider that made all the important processing decisions. "This surprises you?" asked the computer guy. "Think about it: how could a laptop run without a spider?"
This game theory of dating website, or whatever it is, says it will calculate the number of American singles you must meet before finding your soulmate. I was intrigued, but then I found myself unable to fill it out. I really, really, really don't want to know. They seem to have it all figured out, though.
Tactics To Reduce Your Risk of Being Dumped
1. Make sure lover's net benefit with you is larger than competing love.
2. Keep lover's search cost for another love high by limiting his/her social network size.
3. Lower lover's attractiveness by undermining his/her financial success.
4. Keep lover's maintenance cost with you lower than competing love.
5. Lower lover's risk of being dumped by confessing your love often.
6. Show commitment using a promise or engagement ring.
7. Become jaded. Grow thick skin and get a heart of stone. Become immune to being dumped.
8. Pursue people who are shy, unattractive, or unwanted.